Apparently I’m in a list-making mood. Really, list-making is the preferred genre of the lazy blogger. It’s pretty easy to come up with something to make a list about. Besides, winter makes me want to hibernate, so I guess it’s a wonder that I’m posting anything at all, especially after taking off about 7 months last year. So, yet another list. This one is for my personal favorite, absolutely disgusting, top ten fishing foods.
- Vienna Sausages: Yes, these things are the ultimate disgusting fishing snack. I don’t even want to know what kind of meat (and non-meat) is inside these things. Even better than the sausages themselves is the disturbingly-not-clear slime in which they percolate. In the South, we pronounce them as Veye-eenies. The Tobasco and BBQ flavors are exquisite and the flavored slime makes an excellent fish attractant.
- Pickled Eggs: It’s amazing what a few months in red food coloring and distilled white vinegar will do for a boiled egg. Excellent with salt and pepper sprinkled liberally on top.
- Pickled Sausages: Red food coloring and distilled white vinegar must be heaven’s own marinade based on what it can do for boiled eggs and mashed-up pig, beef and chicken parts.
- Slim Jims: Artificial imitation beef-flavored sticks with just the right amount of spiciness. Maybe they do contain real beef. I don’t know. I just know they’re lovely.
- Peanuts and RC Cola: Peanuts alone? Eh, take ‘em or leave ‘em. But dump them into a can of RC Cola and suddenly the sun breaks through the clouds and choir music drifts on the gentle breeze.
- Sardines (plain in soybean oil): I hated these things when I was a kid, but now I love them with saltine crackers and maybe a dash of hot sauce. Also good straight out of the can.
- Potted Meat: Don’t want to know what’s in this stuff. I just know it’s great on saltine crackers. Also good when you make a sandwich from it. Just smear it all over one slice of bread, spread the other slice with a healthy dose of mustard, marry them together and enjoy. The Deviled Ham potted meat is especially good for sandwiches.
- Beanie Weenies: White beans, hot dog slices and a vaguely tomato-like sauce. Whoever came up with this is a genius. Also good with saltines.
- Charley’s Hot Bologna: There’s a real mystery-meat theme to my list. This is the best of the lot, but I haven’t been able to find it for years. It’s basically a log of bologna spiced with a healthy dose of cayenne. The best way to eat it is to cut off a hunk, dump hot sauce all over it, then take a bite of bologna and then a bite of saltine cracker. Wash it all down with a Sun-Drop cola.
- Cheese Danish: I’m not crazy about sweet stuff, but the list feels incomplete without one. Plus, this is the best gas station pastry out there. I fueled many a summer morning fishing trip during my high school and college years with these things.
You got any favorites? Maybe I’ll make a Top Ten Fishing Beers list next. That’s sure to excite some arguments.
-Nathan
Might be a little too fancy for this list, but I’ve had my share of pickled quail eggs….yyyuuuuummmmmyyyyyy!!!
Nope, pickled quail eggs are definitely not too high brow for this list (I have pickled eggs on there – didn’t say what kind)! What the heck do you mean anyway?! Mashed up pig parts and pickled everything is back in style. Don’t you ever watch the Food Network?!
Peanuts in RC? How does one even come up with that?
Dude, you’ve never had peanuts in a coke? Must be an Alabama thing. We always used to do that. There’s just something about a salty peanut floating in carbonated high fructose corn syrup. They’re even better if you let them sit in there awhile and get a tad soggy.
Snacks must be on everyone’s brain right now. Tom Chandler over at Trout Underground waxes poetic over Whoppers: http://troutunderground.com/2011/02/07/its-a-forbidden-love/
Excellent! I recently wrote a column about fishing trip snacks. Even mentioned RC/peanuts combo. I’m told it should be in the July Oklahoma Today magazine. I’ll try to send you a copy. Cheers!